When you talk I listen to you
But more than that I see you
You and all your gestures
And your eyes speaking their language
This cannot be mere attraction
I can’t look away when you talk
I can’t admire the pretty beach you want me to see
I can’t even smile
I get so lost in your
eyes
Your eyes make me want to stop time
So I can only look and marvel in the glory of being held in your attention.

Reached work, but bored already.
Life is calling, where the hell am I.
I detest sitting here and pretending to work.
Ah! I ignore my world trip for a little money making.
Money. Who the hell invented this disaster.



We met yesterday,
We went by the sea,
And held hands.
We do now what we were to do years back.
And we do it with the urgency that comes with waiting
A long wait...

Where should I start, when I am stuck in this denial mode.
You cry
You cry there all alone, because I left you
Not us this could never happen to us
But it did
I am still in shock
We were forever, so we thought
It burned our souls and our skins too.
When we were away from each other.
So now, what is this?
Why am I not hurting and you are, for both of us.
Why do I want another pair of eyes on me, another heart in my bosom, another soul in my body.
Why is my pain, not the one of separation, but of my betrayal.
So many memories
So many days
The movies, the park, the class, the lab, the dungeon staircase
The walking together in the evenings and early morning too
The calls and billion texts
The loving
So intense.
What should I do.
To have it back or what should I do
Because I don’t want it now
I don’t want you
My head reels
How can I not want you.
After wanting you for every second of my life, since we met
What is it God
What is wrong with me.

I don’t even know how I am still standing
How have I not been crushed under this suffocatingly-liberating love of yours
I am still eating, but lesser.
I am still working, but slower.
I am still living, but faster.
I am still thinking, but only of us.
I am going, I know, I am going down and under.
And I will be there till you come to take me away
From there too
You will keep me company in the asylum, I know you will.
It's liberating is it not
Oh! it's suffocating?
No it's not
Not for me
Never for me

You say I didn’t live my life, my way,
Maybe you are right, maybe not,
I know what I did back then was the easiest,
But I came back to you,
You are my personal betrayal,
I left behind my integrity and self esteem,
Because, I realized, with you they didn’t matter,
But tell me my friend, now,
Are you living your life, your way?

When a great tragedy happens, the whole world cries. Sheds tears from their weary eyes and ask why did god not give a clue..that could prevent somehow this happening. I wonder how fragile human life is and yet to let petty issues bother your existence.
What could be more of a shame. With morbid fascination, I read more. I cringe when I am into the details. The gory truth; how they already knew they were dying, that there a split-second before the surety.And no amount of wishing and praying could help them.